I recently spoke at a workshop in Montrose, Colo., presenting to the usual collection of coaches, parents, city recreation administrators, city officials and some younger kids decked out in their team gear. Then a group of teenagers walked in with their coach, and there was something about this group made me pause.

They took a seat in the front, and I went over and introduced myself. I asked if they were on a team together, and they said, “No, we live together.”

These boys were from the Robert A. Brown Center for Youth, a shelter, detention center and transitional living program for boys. Little did I know how much their presence that day would crystalize for me everything that the Changing the Game Project does to make youth sports a better environment for our kids.

During a group discussion about why kids quit sports, one by one these boys stood up and told their stories. Every story began with a smile as they told about the sports they loved as kids, but all of them eventually led to a sadder place.

“I had a basketball coach that disrespected me and made me feel like I was worthless.”

“I had a football coach that never put me in the game at 12 years old, and I could never understand why. I came to every practice and tried my best, but he did not care enough to let me play a single play.”

“I used to love soccer, but some kids on my team made it miserable whenever I made a mistake. They made fun of me, and the coach did nothing. He just laughed with them.”

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Every one of them had quit sports by age 13. Even scarier is that every one of them could trace a direct line between the day they walked away from sports and their current placement in a residential home for things such as substance abuse, stealing and fighting.

When they walked away from sports, they walked into a very different life, and now they were clawing their way back out.

But these boys had the courage to stand up and tell their stories in front of coaches, teachers, even their mayor. They owned up to the mistakes they made.

All I could think was: “When, as adults, are we going to own up to our mistakes? When are we going to admit that we are responsible for driving these kids out of sports?”

When are we going to admit that sports matter and that we have a responsibility to make them serve the needs, values and priorities of our kids?

Here are three reasons why sports matter.

Sports teach values

Sports do not teach character and values unless they are intentionally taught by coaches. Youth sports are a vehicle to teach perseverance, humility, integrity, compassion, courage, and the like. Our schools are struggling to do it, the Internet is not doing it and popular culture is certainly not doing it.

Much of the entertainment targeted at children and teens centers on becoming a star and getting rich. As a result, studies have found that fame is now the No. 1 value held by children ages 9 to 11.

As psychologist Dr. Jim Taylor said, “These distorted values are definitely not going to prepare (kids) for life in adulthood where, for most of us, narcissism and aspirations of wealth and fame don’t usually play well with reality.”

Sports help a child live a longer, healthier life

Childhood obesity is an epidemic. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 17 percent of U.S. children ages 6 to 12 – nearly 12 million – are obese. Research is predicting that today’s children are the first generation ever to have a shorter life expectancy than their parents.

Our schools are cutting physical education classes and recess despite the evidence of definitive positive links between activity and learning. And the CDC tells us that regular physical activity in children and teens improve strength and endurance, helps build healthy bones and muscles, helps control weight, reduces anxiety and stress, increases self-esteem and may improve blood pressure and cholesterol levels. Sixty minutes of physical activity each day also helps reduce the risk of diabetes, cardiovascular disease and colon cancer.

Sports teach courage, resilience and grit

Sports teach kids to lead, to follow, to take responsibility and to working with others. Sports instills sportsmanship, competitiveness and a sense of fair play. 

Every athlete, regardless of ability, has the opportunity to learn lifelong skills through sports, and every athlete deserves the opportunity to do so. Youth sports is a development zone not only for athletic skills but for life.

Sports matter to our culture but sadly the entertainment value has begun to outweigh the educational value, and this has trickled down to the youth level.

Sports matter because they can change lives, because they might be the one positive in an otherwise terrible life for a kid.

Sports matter, as those amazing boys in Colorado taught me, because they might keep a kid on the straight and narrow when other influences are leading him or her down a far darker path.  

It’s high time every one of us takes a stand and commits to doing them the right way.

This article originally appeared on ChangingTheGameProject.com. 

John O'Sullivan is the founder of the Changing the Game Projectand author of the bestseller “Changing The Game: The Parents Guide to Raising Happy, High-Performing Athletes and Giving Youth Sports Back to our Kids.”