Every player’s biggest fans are the parents who sit in the bleachers cheering for them.

We cheer when they win and play well, and hopefully, encourage when they lose and don’t have such a great game. But no matter the outcome of the game or how many touchdowns they score or tackles they pile up, we parents never want to miss seeing them play.

But inevitably we will. Whether it’s due to work, another child’s game, a community activity, or yes, even a round of golf with friends, we are bound to most likely miss at least one game each season.

And that’s OK.

I once overheard my uncle telling my mother, “Missing games makes kids realize that there are more important things than sports. Maybe not places we’d rather be than watching their games, but things we have to do as part of our normal everyday lives.”

And he’s right.

Two weeks ago I missed a game because I was at my other son’s activity. Just this past weekend, I had to skip a game because of work. My wife sent me updates but the excitement for me just wasn’t the same reading a text message saying my son scored as it is watching it unfold in person.

But I survived. And he did too. In fact, I know I cared a lot more about missing the game than he missed me being there. That just reinforces that he’s playing youth sports for the right reason – his enjoyment, not mine.

Every time I do miss a game, before I leave I tell him the same thing. It’s a simple message: Play smart, play hard, have fun. It’s just six words that hopefully send an impactful message. 

I never mention winning because that’s not why we’re involved in youth sports. We’re involved for all of the other reasons youth sports give him, and our family, a positive life experience.

If he plays smart and plays hard, the winning often takes care of itself. And as we all know, winning is always fun.

Telling him those six words doesn’t make missing the games any more tolerable for me. Instead, what I hope is that at some point during the game he thinks about the message, and when he does, he remembers that no matter where I am or what I’m doing, I’m thinking about him playing and wishing I was sitting in the bleachers.  

Jon Buzby has been involved in and writing about youth sports for the past 30 years, originally as a coach and board member with his now-adult son and most recently "just as a dad" with his 8- and 10-year-old sons. Jon is an award-winning writer and his latest book, “Not an Expert, Just a Dad … In this Crazy Game Called Life,” is available on Amazon. Send comments or future blog topics you'd like to see to JonBuzby@hotmail.com and follow him @YouthSportsBuzz on Twitter.