Teaching kids motivation to work hard and do the right thing is a huge challenge for many parents. The list of tactics includes bribery, threats, comparison, cajoling, and shaming. Those “solutions” are short-term at best, but the long-term answer to motivating children is much more complicated.

I recently asked parents in my Raising Champions Parenting Group how they motivated their kids in situations where they wanted to see their kids work harder or even just show some initiative. Here are some wise parenting responses.

What Motivates Your Child to Give Their Best Effort in Practices and Games?

A team attitude and friendship.

 It’s gotta come from within. I ask them about their goals, and when the opportunity arises ask them if their choice is supporting that goal. This helps in both practice and in games.

My son is self-motivated by love for the game, he is very competitive, and just loves playing. I never have to motivate him. His passion comes from within.

My kid is this way as well. I can see his passion grow with the age. I don’t have to do much now.

I must be honest, for my daughter when she started it was friends. As she grew older it was for the girls she played with and for the love of the sport. Now she wants to be a coach. Couldn’t be prouder!

Having their OWN goals and their OWN reasons to do so.

Praise, constant encouragement no matter what the circumstances

My daughter said that she is always trying to beat herself. She told me that she runs against a shadow of herself who is always beating her.

How about you? What motivates your child?

Janis Meredith is a family coach who wants to help all parents raise champions. You can find out more at rcfamilies.com.